A blog.

转眼，树上的叶子快落齐了。

没有太阳的白天
没有寒意的秋风

我望不到去年的这个时间,
淅沥的秋雨打在地上,
我们淋在古老建筑的身旁，
似湿非湿地

湖和海就在看不见的眼前。

心是灰色的,没有未来,没有任何时间的概念

一顿吃在下午的早餐

身体和脚都是冷的

随着这些落叶，我望不到去年了。

Running on four-hour sleep, still feeling oddly awake. Shooting pictures during the day; at night, traveling between strange bodies of animals at night clubs, like a being from another world. Hunting for beauty with a silent eye, perhaps?

As far as I can see, there are two ways I can live. One, seclude myself within a world that is my ideal, always trying to strive for the purest, holiest within this white-walled, spacious and absolutely magnificent world. That is not to say to pretend like things unacceptable to my world doesn't happen around me - but perhasp, we are simply two co-excisting universe.

Another, to experience the other extreme. Be immersed but not devoured; read, look and ponder. It is a world I would never understand. But, it makes my own world seems so much more lovely and so much more desired upon.

The thing is, once you experience the second way, there is no way to go back. But, I think I can do it.

Sometimes the image of "death" in its black robe and hood hovering within the human world reminds me of what I am at night clubs. Just a complete outsider hovering around. Ha ha, hopefully I am not death?

今天傍晚一个人开车去沙滩散步。收音机里十分惬意的爵士乐，和一天最强烈也是最柔和的阳光照在春天里洋洋得意的一切，我的心都像被微风抚摸过的发髻，荡漾得无边无际。

几年前的我在上高中，每到五月我的心比那发芽的花和树还要在怒放，好像春天的朝气充满了我的全身，我可以自由自在地飞翔在天空里。后来，每个五月份来临的时候，我的心就飞得越来越没有以前那样自在了。人长大了，都会这样吧，我想。也许是习惯了。

我订了一个给我nikon D70的遥控器，打算也尝试一下HDR。

这些日子，我的思想都有些像多伦多的夏天一样 - 缤纷五彩，但却没有一点立体感。

喜欢上这么一种花，英文叫ranunculus, 中文名字找不到。是这样子的：

让我看上去心里感到暖暖的。这种花有毒。

正在我写这篇文章的时候，朋友Ben发过来了他照的我毕业音乐会的照片。正好拿上来一张分享了 - 并，谢谢Ben的照片和鼓励！

刚发现马勒的生日居然是和勃拉姆兹是一样的。

前几天去听了一场马勒的第六交响曲。听完发现，我是越来越喜欢早期音乐 - 像巴洛克音乐 （我并不是指巴赫，虽然我是非常喜欢他的）。小时候一直到不久的以前，一直就喜欢浪漫派； 现在越来越发现有点闹心。这马勒第六听得我听完了特揪心，还有点犯晕。但是，还是十分认真热情地给指挥老头使劲鼓掌 - 毕竟人家高旬，光站那一个多小时就很不简单了，还得动来动去，身心投入，太不容易了。

这两天受人推荐，看了一下《我的青春谁做主》一剧。发现，这个社会真是在变啊。感到, ..... 很多很多感动，又重新把中国这现代社会和文化（虽然也许不代表大多数）给认识了一遍。另，听着剧里大家的北京口音，我真叫舒心啊..

我做了一个180度的决定，本来打算回国的，但是因为考虑明年上学的问题，打算暑假在多伦多挣点钱给自己当学费。如果有谁需要钢琴家教，演奏者（比如婚礼等），或者是摄影服务（我的一些作品：http://esofxz.sqweebs.com）,感谢您联系我。

This trip to NYC has proven many things and did me, yet again, some good. Even though I was so sick I had literally thought I was infected with swine flu - but luckily I got better, thanks to Eric's amazing care-taking and my two Columbia friends' giving me a place to rest.

Two nights ago we went to hear a chamber music concert - I think chamber music has really become one of my favourite musical forms, and is such a delightful kind of concert to attend. It was my first time hearing Beethoven's string trio, and I loved it. Afterwards, we sat at a Starbucks near the Lincoln Centre, as we were sipping our way through the gourmet tea, a trail of police cars passed by and this middle-aged gentleman besided me told us that they were there to protect Michelle Obama because she was at the American Ballet Theatre giving a speech. "This is how much security it takes for the First Lady." He remarked.

New York City.

What can I say. I am very excited to be here for the next two years of my life. As I was taking a walk this morning, after recovering from the sickness yesterday, seeing the sunshine of spring, happy faces of the Columbia graduates, busysiness of the city, I realized that this is going to be a new begining, just like how it was four years ago sitting on my balcony at home looking out, almost exactly the same feeling, except I think I have become a little wiser, just a little.